Friday, July 29, 2005


I am alone for the weekend. At last. I haven't posted much lately because I just haven't had the energy. I am slowly having my lifeforce sucked from me by a hormonal teenager.

Oh sure, they start out all helpless and cute. Then they figure out exactly how to manipulate you to get what they want. The CIA should start reciting them at this age. They ply you with the puppy dog eyes and when they don't get their way they whip out their secret weapon. The Temper Tantrum. Whether you are hell bent on world domination or just trying to get the grocery shopping done, a temper tantrum can bring you to your knees in an instant.

Eventually they outgrow this and things fall into a comfortable routine for a few years. Any minor bumps along the way are easily resolved. Mom & Dad still hold the answers for everything, they can make all that is wrong right again. It may seem as though these innocent souls are busy learning and discovering new things. It may seem they are on the right path. It may seem that they still look at you with those adoring eyes. Dad is their Superhero, Mom is the rest of their world.


This is nothing more than a ploy to lull you into complacency. They are only waiting for the hormones to kick in to execute the evil plan they have been devising. Once puberty hits, you will realize you have been setup.

Once the center of their world, you now become the bane of their existence. You may have felt like The Oracle, but you have suddenly become the stupidest person on the planet. Once they move into their Sophomore year of Highschool they have surpassed your limited knowledge. Your logic and reason are not applicable in their world any longer. Your purpose in life has suddenly become nothing more than a barrier to their greatness. You're "ruining" their lives. You never want them to have any fun or be happy, and if their not happy, there is no way in hell you will be.

They are above the menial labor of cleaning their room or taking out the trash. Why should they pick the towel up off the floor if they are only going to use it again for their second or third shower of the day? The floor is much more convenient for dirty clothes, putting them in the hamper is much too exhausting. Why should the bed be made up only to sleep in it 12 hours later? The sink is much closer for dirty dishes than the empty dishwasher. Wearing 3 outfits a day is why we have washing machines! You have become nothing more than a tyrant that uses them as your personal slave.

This is the point when you realize that your once perfect child has been kidnapped by aliens and replaced with a lifesucking vampire clone.

I tried using a bunch of really cool links to enhance this post. Alas, I must have done something wrong and none of them worked. I'll have to work on figuring out what I did wrong and attempt it again.


izchan said...


teenagers are the reason why parents have ulcers.
I know, I gave mine several.

Its how GOD make us pay for all the aggrevations we gave to our own parents.


at least you can talk to your kids rite?

KFarmer said...

Has he tried the "you are trying to lock me up!!!" scene yet? OMG- I nearly killed mine before he finally grew up. If I can find the note he wrote me years later, (yes-I suffer from CRAP) I will send it to you. Perhaps it will give you hope that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Be strong. : )

Sharfa said...

Izchan - ahh yes, The Parents Curse. I can talk to him, doesn't mean he hears me. I'm just the Mom and he has selective hearing loss.

kfarmer - No, haven't heard that one yet. I'm just the one responsible from him having any kind of a life. Right, that's why I haven't been on a date in two years. I live for the day I get one of those letters, and - I hope he has a kid JUST LIKE HIM.

KFarmer said...

Ha! Oh yeah.. Mine is 24 and it wont be long before he has a little package if his wife has anything to say about it. I cant wait.

By the by- where's my eye ; )

izchan said...

children hear everything (I mean everything, don't kid yourself when you are pushing your face into the pillow while having an orgasm that they don't hear it). The thing is if they so chose to act on it.

rebelious teens have only that much of excuses to use to blame their parents for their shitty life.

some are true, some are just dramatic.

children will look back upon the days when you were not cool and being a monarch of their lives as the time where you did your job best.

Parents are expected to tell the hard facts to their children, because its the only way they can learn to be better. They might not like it, but it has to be done.

Being a parent is not just about being their friend. Its also being their guide. Their compass in life.

True, we might not be steering a good path ourself but it does not mean we can leave them be.

Its the jobs of parents to be PARENTING. And by that definition, that will also mean, taking them under your wings even though they are threatening to tear your feathers away, one handful at a time.

This is what parents do.
its in the fine print

talk to them, because they will listen (sooner or later).

Sharfa said...

kfarmer - would love to send you my eye. Need an e-mail addy though. If you sent something to my addy, I didn't get it. Try and I'll gladly send you my eye. wink!

izchan said...

sharfa .. you study at MIT?


now I am awed.

dumbfounded, actually.

Now I actually tell people that I know someone from MIT. :)

Sharfa said...

izchan - I just work there, doing the finances. No awe deserved here.

I am in awe of the brilliant minds myself. One thing I love about my job (and there are many, many things I love), is that the kids who attend MIT, and I do mean kids, are the most down to Earth easy going people you could ever want to meet.

I am very lucky to deal with some of the worlds leading scientists that are the kindest, most understanding and generous people I have ever met. They are not pompous or conceited. They respect and appreciate the work I do. Can you imagine? They're out there making groundbreaking discoveries, publishing papers in medical journals and praising me for balancing the books!

I will be forever grateful to my best friend, Darlene, for pointing me in the direction of this job opportunity.

Sharfa said...

izchan - IT'S IN THE FINE PRINT?! I never got the manual!

That's it - I'm calling the BBB!

izchan said...

people always forget the fine print ... :P